Roots Before Branches

This song really resonated with me. Posting the video and lyrics here, hopefully you can relate to this too.

So many things
To do and say
But I can't seem
To find my way
But I wanna know how
I know
I'm meant
For something else
But first
I gotta find myself
But I don't know how

Oh, why do
I reach for the stars
When I don't have wings
To carry me that far?

I gotta have
Roots before branches
To know who I am
Before I know
Who I wanna be
And faith
To take chances
To live like I see
A place in this world
For me

Sometimes
I don't wanna feel
And forget the pain
Is real
Put my head
In the clouds
Oh, start to run
And then I fall
Seein'
I can't get it all
Without my feet
On the ground

There's always a seed
Before there's a rose
The more that it rains
The more I will grow

I gotta have
Roots before branches
To know who I am
Before I know
Who I wanna be
And faith
To take chances
To live like I see
A place in this world
For me

Whatever comes
I know how to take it
Learn to be strong
I won't have to fake it
Oh, you're understandin'
Oh, but when you come
And do it best
There ain't nothin'
To stoppin' east to west
(I'm not sure
If this is right)
But I'll still
Be standing
I'll be standing

July 20, 2012

Since last night (Philippine time), I have been glued to CNN and US news - saddened and horrified over the news about the Aurora, Colorado theater shooting. This happened during the midnight showing of the Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rising. My prayers and condolences go out to all the victims, family, and friends of this horrific incident.

First off, I wanted to say that I completely agree with Anderson (Cooper) when he said on his show Anderson Cooper 360 that he will only say the gunman's name a few times - that it is typical in appalling events like these to remember the killer's name more than the victims (I paraphrased). So I urge everyone, as you Google or tweet or post or blog about this tragedy, that you focus more on stories about the victims - their lives and their stories, instead of the monster who started this all.

I saw a news cast where it was mentioned that the gunman dyed his hair red and he mentioned that he was "The Joker." I also read that he lived alone and kept to himself. In my opinion, this looks to be the work of a deranged person who has lost all touch with reality. In fact, the first time I saw this on the news my first reaction was "wow, this is uncannily similar to the plot of the movie where this happened." I can't even begin to imagine what pushed this man over the edge to do all this horrific things.

This tragedy has reminded me once again about the importance of surrounding a person with people who exert a good influence and, if not a loving, at least a supportive environment. I don't claim to be an expert in human behavior, and i understand that there are issues that can't be solved by merely having someone to talk to, but I am a firm believer in the power of knowing that I can talk (or chat or email) to someone about what I am going through, good or bad. I know I speak for a lot of you out there when I say that there has been a lot of times in my life where all it took was to have someone ask me how I am doing, in order for me to know that someone still cares. And that made all the difference. I am extremely grateful to my own support system - my partner, friends, and family. I am going to spend a little bit more time today showing them how important they are to me. Maybe through a text, a phone call, a hug, or even a good laugh. I suggest you do the same.

For more information on this tragedy, please go to this link.

Posted from my iPad with Blogsy

Monday, August 3, 2009

Love Notes

Recently I have had a lot of chances to meet new guys - go out on dates with them; maybe see a movie, and eventually get to do what people who don’t have to worry about getting the other person pregnant do. I also had a chance to bond with better people and real friends, who have and still are a big help whenever I needed a sounding board, especially whenever I attempt to make sense, or worse, justify, my actions. It was because of one of these very recent discussions that I am writing this note about love and the many variations of its definition. I have read a lot of definitions of love and have heard a lot of people define how love is for them. I realized that through the years, my definition of love (and relationships) has evolved, and that whatever current definition of love I had at that time depended largely on whether or not I was going out with someone.

After lying here in bed for hours I finally realized that because of the current state of my love (or relationship) life, I see love as not blindly wanting to be with a person because I “love” him, but because we fit. I see love as not so much compromise as it is a partnership of sorts – a medium where two different (sometimes very different) people make the mutual decision to be together, not because it’s convenient or ideal, but because they WANT to.

Maybe when I’m part of a relationship again my perspective will change. I am certainly known for switching ideas at the drop of a hat or for batting for the other team. But for right now, this is how I look at what love is and how relationships are built out of it.

So Close

You’re in my arms, and all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together and when I’m with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by, romantic dreams will stop
So I bid mine goodbye and never knew
So close was waiting, waiting here with you
And now forever I know, all that I wanted to hold you so close

So close to reaching that famous happy end
Almost believing this was not pretend
Now you’re beside me, and look how far we’ve come
So far we are so close

Oh, how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We’re so close to reaching that famous happy end
And almost believing this was not pretend
Let’s go on dreaming for we know we are
So close, so close and still so far

Monday, April 13, 2009

First day of the week. This Monday is the first Monday after Lent so officially I am supposed to snap out of my vacation mode and realize that the tax deadline of the IRS is this Wednesday, so I need to step up my game and finish any other pending 1099 items that require my resolution.

I am also on my way back to the gym, after being away for almost 5 days.

Things to come: general apartment clean-up and killer exercise moves to target the abs and lower back area.

My first post

Yes, this is my first live post on my new web log. Officially though this is not my first time ever, as I have always kept a personal journal on the Spaces website.

It has always been my personal belief that blogging is a writer’s 15 minutes of fame (minimum time may change, depending on length of entry!) on the internet, and that with fame comes a lot of personal responsibility, akin to great power (*grins). Because of this I have always kept my personal thoughts secret, because of the amount of public scrutiny I know my writings will be subjected to. This has recently changed because of the amount of fun I have been having on Facebook – seeing as how people actually respond and connect through the millions of posts and comments that are generated and shared across millions of members that are in one way or another connected.

So here I am, a little late perhaps in catching the blog bug, but looking forward to making up for lost time. To quote a famous Filipino phrase:

“Huli man at magaling, maihahabol din.”

- J

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